A Wolf Among Sheep
by Kiyoko Usagi
Summary: "He doesn't remember his name, or where he came from- but I do. I remember what he did to Henry, what he did to my family and yet… I don't really care anymore. That smile…those eyebrows…the way he pouts when I tell him no. Can this sheep truly be the wolf it once was? What if he remembers again?" (Warning: Bisexual love triangle, Captain Swan and Pan, slash).
1. Chapter 1

As another warning, please be advised this story does not focus solely on a heterosexual romance and does have romantic situations between homosexual partners as well as heterosexual partners, even threesomes (if the fancy takes me that way, it's not set in stone.) This is not what I would consider a Captain Swan story, more of an experimental love triangle between Emma, Hook and Peter if this hypothetical situation occurred.

Oh and to clarify, Peter and Henry did NOT switch bodies. :)

* * *

Emma hadn't exactly known what was going on, but she had a feeling. It was the kind of feeling that always had her looking over her shoulder, the kind that cradled that soft, cold tingle at the base of one's spine… Worst of all, it was the kind of feeling a mother received when she knew her offspring was in danger. Trusting her instincts, she'd gathered up her mother and father, Snow and Charming also known as Mary Margaret and David as well as Rumple and Belle. They had taken Pandora's Box and went to the city limits. This would be the end of it all. Finally, Emma would be able to sleep at night, finally that cold, nagging feeling would go away and finally she could stop checking over her shoulder.

"There's no magic beyond the town line. If we release Pan outside Storybrooke, he'll be powerless to fight back," Rumple said walking in toe with Belle.

"Ah-ah. I'm doing this," Emma said as she rounded on Rumplestiltskin. Her gaze was stern but pleading. She needed this to be over. She needed this all to be over for Henry. For everyone.

"I can cross the town lines and keep my memories," Rumple defended pointedly.

"It's not about that. There's no magic over there. All due respect- the real world's my expertise."

Rumple gave her a long, contemplative look, one that attempted to hide his yearning for this to be over as well, but Emma could see right through him. He gave her a resigned look as she moved with her gun across the town lines, determined to get this _all_ over with. Pan needed to die… He needed to go away so Henry and her family would be safe again, hopefully forever. "I'm going to deal with Pan on my terms," she said over her shoulder.

"He is my father," Rumple responded quickly.

"My hunch!" Emma defended, going back and forth on her legs as she shuffled her weight. "If I fail one of you are more than welcome to pick up the pieces."

"Emma!" Snow said, worry laced into her words as she stood close to her husband. "Be careful."

She nodded at her mother, and then looked to Rumple who activated the Box, placing it on the other side of the town's line. Emma's heart raced. It would have been a lie to say that it wasn't entirely free of trepidation, but it was mostly anticipation. It was so close to being over… She steadied her gun, watching the red smoke form into a body.

Her finger threatened to just slam down on the trigger as she saw Pan, lying there looking around before standing up; his back facing her. As he turned around, fear clouded his expression and Emma could see his chest begin heaving as he gasped in air.

"Wait, don't!" he exclaimed. "W-who are you? Where am I?"

"Don't listen to him! It's one of his tricks!" Rumple shouted.

Emma hesitated. Something was different. The boy before her didn't have the same menace in his eyes, didn't have the same dull shaded orbs of a being much older than its appearance. Those eyes were young, inexperienced and so very afraid.

"Who am I? What's that?" He backed up, pointing to Emma's gun.

"Shoot him!" Rumple said angrily. Belle merely placed a hand on his arm to calm him.

"Who are you?" Emma said, still holding the gun raised. "You're Peter Pan! This is a gun!"

Peter dropped his hands, cocking his head to the side. "What did I do to you?" His voice quivered, like a child cowering in the night from a movie his parents had explicitly told him not to watch, but he had anyway. This wasn't the Peter Pan Emma knew, not by a long shot.

Emma felt her fingers tingling. This was supposed to be easy, it was supposed to be over!

"The line!" Belle shouted. "What if it erased his memories? The queen didn't have another life for him planned."

Peter looked over to Belle, his eyes round in panic, still breathing heavily. "The queen? N-no memories? I don't understand. I don't know… Who am I?" Tears began streaming down his cheeks as he crumpled to his knees.

"You can't do this!" Belle said, stepping close to the line.

"So he forgets who he is now. And how can we be sure he's telling the truth?" Rumple disputed.

Charming and Snow shared worried glances, holding each other tightly. "Emma?" Snow said.

"I know." Emma moved over to Peter, kneeling down in front of him and reaching out to the boy's chin. He jerked away before realizing she wasn't doing him any harm, and then he met her gaze.

"Do you really not know who you are?"

Pan swallowed hard, choking back a sob. "No…"

Emma closed her eyes, her heart was thumping wildly in her chest as her lungs released the air that she'd been holding in for far too long. She looked up at her family, at Rumple and Belle. "He's telling the truth."

"We can't do this," Charming said. "It's not right."

"What does it matter if it's right or not. Pan needs to die!" Rumple said.

"No… Not like this," Snow said. "We're taking him home."

All eyes turned to snap upon Snow's frame. Emma couldn't even believe what she was hearing.

"We have to. This way, we can keep an eye on him, and protect him all at the same time," Snow explained. "We can't just abandon him."

"Oh, but he can abandon me?" Rumple said through gritted teeth.

"He isn't the one who abandoned you," Snow said as she pointed at Peter's frightened frame. "He can't be held responsible for those actions."

Emma reached out her hand to Pan. She watched as he looked at the gesture, deciding if it was a good idea or not. "Peter…" she said softly. "I'm sorry this happened to you. It wasn't you I was after…"

Everyone looked at her in astonishment.

"You look like someone else. Someone who was very cruel to our family. But we were wrong. Come home with us and I'll explain to you everything."

Peter sniffled. He softly took her hand, standing up with her. She offered him a warm smile, though it didn't reach her eyes. It was all supposed to have been over…

Now it was all just beginning.

* * *

**A/N: **Little idea I've had lulling about in my head. I don't seem to read much Once fanficiton (though if you know of good ones, please let me know! I have no "favorite pairing" so any suggestions are welcome. I prefer well written plot infused pieces vs "fluff" though. So with that being said, if this is one of those stories that is done over and over, oops! I hope you enjoy! Let me know your thoughts? 0.o


	2. Chapter 2

I don't like rushing romance, so if slow beginnings kind of irk you, I'm sorry :/  
Thank you everyone for the reviews and faves / alerts, it's really great to see support for such an odd...thing that I'm about to do, as well as Pan not being Pan but being Pan but...not. Wait what? XD

And yes to again clarify, Peter Pan and Henry did NOT switch bodies. Otherwise this story would reallllllly be messed up. XD

* * *

They had taken Peter back to the Charming residence. He was to take the couch for his stay, that way Charming and Snow could keep an eye on him while everyone slept. That night, Emma had sat Peter down and tried her best to detail her account of Peter Pan and Neverland, explaining the world that they lived in now, and the one where her family was from. Peter had cocked a brow many times, even going so far as to calling her a liar, but it was never cruel. There was so much fear in his eyes, how else was he supposed to react?

She had finally gotten him to lie down after being asked thousands of questions, most of them concerning who he was, and why she was holding a gun to him. With a lot of careful treading, she evaded most of the horrific answers, and did her best to sugar coat them. She'd given him her account of what happened on that island as gently as she could. She softened the cruelty of Pan's acts, forgoing the entire existence of the shadow and its abilities and even that Pan had tried to force Henry to give up his heart. Everything was sugar coated and made so much lighter than what it truly was, but she didn't want to just dump everything on him, not like this. Not when those eyes were so round and full of fear with nothing familiar to calm their gaze.

Sighing, she leaned against the sink in the kitchen, rubbing at her neck.

"What are we going to do now?" Mary Margaret asked.

Emma rolled her neck, staring up at the ceiling. "I don't know…"

"We did the right thing. Leaving him would have been worse- and killing him…"Her words faltered, leaving the sentence hanging in the air.

"I know. I just… What if he regains his memories? What then?" Emma creased her brow in worry.

"We deal with that when it comes, but right now… We've got a seventeen year-old-boy, newly added to our family." Snow gave Emma a quick squeeze on the hand before moving to cover Peter in more blankets.

Emma sighed, staring at the drain. He'd been so afraid. How could someone so…strong…so terrifying fall to being someone so afraid? Closing her eyes, she pushed these thoughts away, figuring it best not to dwell further at this point. Though, she never did sleep once that night.

Peter woke alone the next day. At first he started to panic, not knowing where he was, but then the memories slowly trickled in. He'd been…someone else once. Someone bad. Guilt; heavy and thick plagued at his throat and heart as he sat up, looking about the small apartment, trying to swallow the uncomfortable feeling down. He saw two bodies, tangled into each other at the front of the room in front of a large window, heavily curtained to keep the sun out. He removed the covers, allowing his bare feet to touch the cold, wooden floor. He'd done something so much more horrible than what Emma let on, he was sure of it. The way she spoke, the way she tried to dance around the details, he had caught it. He may have lost his memories, but he wasn't stupid. Standing up, he stretched his hands high into the air before going into the bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror, wincing as he concentrated, trying to remember something…anything. Frustrated, he ground his teeth together. What had he done? Why were they so kind to him? The older man…the one they called Mr. Gold, he was the angriest about this. What had Peter done to him? Could he ever atone for something he didn't remember?

"Peter?" a voice called from behind the door. "Are you in there?"

"Just a moment!" Peter called out before smoothing out his hair and opening the door. He saw Snow, her smile did nothing to comfort his thoughts, but it was at least a nice gesture.

"How about some breakfast?"

"T-thank you," Peter said as he walked over to the kitchen table, sitting down across from David.

Peter could feel the prince's heavy gaze. Still, he did his best to just stare at his fingers, memorizing each finger nail's length.

"Bacon or sausage?" Mary Margaret asked as she turned on the stove.

Charming looked to Peter to give the answer. Peter felt his heart lurch in his chest. "I… I don't know which one I like better."

It was then that Peter saw Charming's shoulders relax a bit, and his eyes soften. He leaned forward in his chair, offering a sort of half smile. "Then I guess we'll just have to make both?"

"Right!" Mary Margaret answered as she went to her refrigerator to pull out the two different styles of meat.

"I'm sorry…" Peter said softly, still staring at his fingers.

Snow moved quickly, coming to kneel by the boy's side, her face full of compassion and sympathy. "You have _nothing_ to be sorry for. We took you in, and we'll feed you and keep you safe."

"Yeah," Charming said. "We'll take care of you."

"But..what if my memories come back? Emma tried to avoid it, but I could tell. I wronged you. I wronged all of you!" His voice was on the verge of shouting. "I can see it in the way you look at me. You study me, looking hard at me just to see what I'll do. You say such nice things…but…" His voice cracked. "But I'm just a prisoner here…till you figure out what to do with me…"

"No…Peter," Snow said as she grabbed the boy's hand. He tensed at first, then relaxed into her. "You did nothing to us. Not you."

"Other me, then…" Peter scoffed.

"Other you isn't you," Charming said. "So today, try to take your mind off what you've forgotten, and maybe look at what you'll learn."

Peter nodded, swallowing the lump that seemed to perpetually reside in his throat now.

Emma came down the stairs not too much later. Snow was serving everyone their breakfast as she plopped down into one of the chairs.

Peter offered her a small smile. Emma returned it, but he could see pain laced in her eyes. Guilt flashed into his stomach again, churning it hard. He clutched at his belly, wincing as he tried to contain the anguish he felt.

"You okay?" Emma asked.

"Just hungry," Peter responded. He saw her give him a stern look, but she didn't question it further.

He ate in silence, listening to their breakfast conversation. It wasn't personal, or anything too interesting, but he had nothing to say. They looked to him from time to time, or would pause to see if he'd add something, but he never did. Thankfully, no one pushed it either.

After breakfast, Peter helped Emma clean up as Snow and Charming went out to talk to everyone about what happened, mainly Regina and Henry.

"Come on, kid," Emma said as she grabbed her leather jacket off the coat hanger. "Let me take you around town."

Peter nodded softly, turning from the sink to stride softly in front of the blonde woman.

She analyzed him for a moment, one eyebrow higher than the other as she pursed her lips. "Well…maybe not yet. Let me see if I can find some clothes to fit you." Emma ran back up the steps. "You're a lot smaller than David!" she shouted from atop the steps.

Peter looked around at the pictures in the rooms, his gaze coming to Emma with a boy. The name Henry had been mentioned at breakfast, he assumed that the boy was in fact, Henry. Emma had a son? But she was so young.

"Hope these work," Emma said as she came down the stairs with some jeans and a red flannel. "The jeans are mine…but…I think you can fit into them. It's not like boys don't go around wearing girl jeans nowadays anyway."

Peter furrowed his brow at the remake on gender specific trousers. "Thank you, Emma," Peter said as he took the clothes. He started to undress there.

"Woah wait!" Emma said. "I'll go into the bathroom. Let me know when you're finished."

Feeling guilty all over, Peter undressed and put on the new clothes hastily. He stared at his reflection in the mirror, but it was dulled with the colors of the outside world. The jeans gripped to his frame tightly, but they certainly weren't uncomfortable. The outfit wasn't as comfortable as his green rags though…

Peter wondered who gave him those clothes, or if he had made them in the first place. He stared longingly at the disheveled, dirty articles of clothing. It was no use worrying about the past… That's what they had all been saying. So he took a deep breath, put on a smile and turned around, facing the inside of the apartment once more. "I'm finished!" he called.

Emma walked out of the bathroom, smiling as Peter twirled for her a few times. "Great, you look better in my jeans than I do. Come on."

Peter felt his cheeks heating a bit at her compliment.

Together they exited the apartment.

Storybrooke was a lot bigger than Peter expected. Though, he wasn't entirely sure what size he'd have been expecting in the first place. He walked side-by-side with Emma, keeping up with the stride of her long legs. He was just a bit taller than her, but only by a bit. He looked into shop windows, seeing the items for sale. He paused when they came to a store with a very different array of items for purchase. He leaned into the window, cupping his eyes to get a better view. "There are…really creepy dolls in there…"

"Not really a store for you, deary," a man's voice stated.

Peter snapped up to see Mr. Gold. The malice in his gaze was almost overwhelming. Peter had to avert his eyes to the ground. "S-sorry," he mumbled.

"We're just passing by, Gold," Emma said, grabbing Peter's hand and pulling him gently forward.

"I did something to him, didn't I?" he asked as they kept walking. He turned to look over his shoulder, seeing the man still watching them.

"It wasn't your fault. Other you was a bit of a jerk."

"More than you let on then?" Peter countered, quirking an eyebrow.

"Let's talk about that later."

They walked to Granny's where Emma opened the door for him and beckoned him inside. "There's some people I want you to meet here."

Peter hesitated at first, but then came inside to see the crowded little diner. No one seemed to pay him any mind, better yet, an older woman with a heavier set body came up to him, smiling warmly. "And who is this doll of a young man?" she asked.

"Granny, this is Peter."

"Peter?" she asked, furrowing her eye brows.

"Long story. Come on, kid. Take a seat over there and get a hot cocoa."

Peter slid into the booth. "Can I have cinnamon on my hot cocoa?" he asked the woman.

"Of course darling," she said. Peter watched as she turned back to Emma. They shared soft, hushed voices before Emma slid in across from Peter at the booth.

"Who taught you about cinnamon and hot cocoa?" Emma asked.

"I dunno…" Peter furrowed his brows for a moment in thought. "I just…thought it was a good idea. I don't…even know what cinnamon tastes like." He laughed sardonically. He felt a strange familiar tingling at the base of his belly, like he was thrilled to see Emma so concerned. Pushing the strange feeling out of his mind, willing it to dissipate, he focused heavily on the smooth surface of the table.

Emma creased her brow as she studied Peter for a moment. Her gaze felt hot against Peter's skin. He did his best to decide the fork was something much more amusing than his current situation.

"I don't want my memories to come back," Peter blurted. "I don't want to know why I thought hot cocoa and cinnamon was a good idea. I don't want to be the other me again."

Emma reached over the table, grabbing his hand in hers. Peter felt his cheeks get hot. "Hey. Now you listen to me. You seem like a nice kid, so I'm going to go by that. What "other you" did in the past, it was wrong, but other you is gone now. This you is perfectly allowed to have hot cocoa and cinnamon. This you is allowed to be scared, but don't for a second think that you need to live in fear. If that day comes… We'll deal with it. But right now… relax, kid. We're here for you."

Peter smiled lightly, nodding in appreciation as the woman came over with the hot cocoa.

"Now I'll be right back. Just stay here till I come back okay?" Emma asked as she stood up.

"Sure, Emma." Pan watched as Emma exited the building. He sighed heavily, trying to calm himself down and just relax. Emma seemed like a nice person. The kind of person that was honest and rather up front with how she felt. She was also rather pretty, which Peter didn't mind having to look at a pretty woman all day. Charming and Snow were definitely good people. Everyone in here didn't seem to know him, or if they did, he hadn't done anything to them (he hoped.) It was just Mr. Gold…

"What are you doing here?" a deep voice called from behind. Peter turned around to see a man clad in a leather trench coat, heavy smudged eyeliner, and a five o'clock shadow. A strange feeling washed over Peter, like this man was someone once extremely familiar, he could practically see them together in a memory, but it was too blurred to make out.

"Do we know each other?" Peter asked.

The man slid into the booth, staring in disbelief at Peter. "Are you serious?"

"Serious about what?" Peter responded furrowing his brows as he jerked his head back a bit in confusion.

The man laughed, shaking his head softly. "Oh this is rich. Tell me, Pan. You going to play this game all day?"

"What game? I don't know who you are. Emma said I lost my memories."

The man's demeanor changed. He stared at Peter for a moment before responding. "How?"

"I don't know. So have we met?" Peter wanted to be right. He wanted to know that they had known each other before.

"Name's Hook, Captain Hook… and yes. We've known each other for a _very_ long time."

Peter blinked, straightening up in a bit of excitement. "Can you tell me about myself?"

"Selfish, rude, a bit of a tease…"

"Lovely." Peter sank in his seat crossing his arms over his chest. He looked out the window, sighing heavily.

"You had some good qualities." Hook said as he took Peter's cup, swirling around the hot cocoa, mixing the whipped cream into the chocolate liquid.

"Like?"

Hook leaned forward a bit, his voice dropping to a whisper. "You did this thing with your-"

"Hook!" Emma shouted in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"Well I live here now. I was just paying my respects to our dear friend here. You still go by Peter right?" Peter nodded in response. "Good. Less confusing. Most of these people have two different names. Beats me why they don't just-"

"Hook!" Emma shouted. "Can we talk…in private?"

"Ah, the Lady Swan wants some alone time eh? Can't disappoint her. You know women." Hook winked at Peter before he stood up. Peter watched as Emma pulled him into a corner. From her facial expression, she looked very serious, and a bit upset. Peter watched Hook's expressions. He mostly laughed, rolled his eyes, and tried to get very close to Emma.

Peter didn't like the way Hook's hands tried to envelop Emma's, or how he tried to brush his nose against hers. He could tell from Emma's tired and pointed expressions and the way she jerked her head away, that she wasn't enjoying this either. Having had just about enough of it, Peter stood up, feeling a fire burn in his heart, going over to the two of them and with a very icy tone he said, "You so much as touch her again and I'll run my fist down your throat."

Both their expressions widened in shock. Peter took a step back, his mouth slightly agape and his gaze jotting every which way. "I…I'm so sorry. I didn't…I didn't mean…" He ran.

There had been a certain feeling he got when he saw Emma cornered like that. It wasn't one of anger against Hook, but one of elation. One that started in the pit of his heart and rose up, almost like he'd drank too much caffeinated soda. And when he'd threatened Hook- his fingers had tingled with such strong compulsions to truly do what he said Peter almost wanted to laugh.

He creased his brow, allowing a frustrated groan to escape his mouth as he continued to run. He passed the carpenter shop, the automobile shop and the flower shop. He passed the realtor and the library. He would have kept running till his legs were incapable of such an act had it not been for that Scottish accent and slick tone. "And just where are you running off to, deary?"

Peter stopped; his cheeks were red from the cold that nipped his face as he had run. His breath was uneven and he felt his lungs desperately crying out for oxygen. He put his hands on his knees, trying to gather up his strength once more. "I…I dunno."

He heard the steady clicks of the man's cane on the pavement coming closer to him. Peter looked up to meet eyes full of hatred and suspicion.

"Mr. Gold… I'm sorry."

Rumple merely responded with an annoyed wince. Peter felt exasperated despite catching his breath finally. Mr. Gold had his reasons, Peter knew that, but it was unsettling. "Why do you want me dead?"

"Where should I start?"

"At the beginning?" Peter said with a raised eyebrow.

Mr. Gold smirked at the response. "You destroyed everything for me."

"Peter!" Emma yelled as she and Hook jogged past the realtor. Mr. Gold took a few steps back, his shoulders straightening up as he composed himself.

"You okay?" Emma asked sincerely. Peter nodded awkwardly, shuffling his feet. He wanted to scream at all of them. If the only person who was willing to tell him the truth, was the one who wanted him dead, so be it. He needed to know. He desperately needed to know… Because it felt just _so_ good to see such hatred in Mr. Gold's eyes…


	3. Chapter 3

Mona, I'm glad I cleared that up for you! I agree, that would have too much "creepy" for my stomach! This is not Shakespeare! X'DD

I'm glad you're all enjoying this so far! I hope to continue pleasing you :) (And that I can keep pumping out relatively quick updates!)

* * *

Emma rapped her fingers over and over again atop the wooden table in their breakfast nook. She stared at the back of Peter's head as he sat with Henry who brought out his book of fairytales to show Peter. Emma had secretly asked that if anything was in there on Peter that it be looked over, lest it be closer to the truth. She hadn't expected this boy to come into her life and completely rock her from her feet. How could someone with such hatred surging through them be so innocent now? Was Pan truly gone? Or was he inside this sweet, beautiful boy?

_'Beautiful?'_

Emma sat up, looking around the kitchen for a moment, trying to think of things she needed to clean. She had always seen Pan as a devil. She'd never taken the time to notice how bright his eyes were against those dark eyelashes or how pouted that mouth was. Rolling her eyes in utter disbelief at herself, she looked over to Hook who was sitting across the table. He was attractive, she was very well aware of that, but his incessant raunchy comments and his one-liners were pathetic. Resigning herself, she stood up, walking over to sit next to Henry on the couch.

"And they lived happily ever after?" Peter asked.

"Well…for awhile. Then other stuff kept happening…" Henry responding, squinting a bit as he looked to be remembering the rest of the tale.

"And…on that note…" Emma said taking the book and closing it. She sucked in her lips, running her tongue over them for a moment in thought. "Henry, can you go call Regina and see if she's coming for dinner tonight?"

"Sure," Henry said as he slid off the couch and over to the phone on the wall.

Emma looked to Peter, her eyes lingering on his long fingers before moving up to view his delicate neck. He was like a porcelain doll… She shook her head as if that would break these thoughts away. "Learn anything?"

She watched Peter drum against his knees as he sat cross-legged. "That there are no happy endings. Just moments."

Emma nodded. "Wise."

"Can I go out tonight? With Hook? After dinner, of course" Peter abruptly asked. Emma cocked her head to the side, her gaze landing on an innocently shrugging pirate. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"He comes home by nine."

"Nine? So we're basically just going for a walk down the street." the pirate sarcastically stated.

"Fine. Ten, but no later."

Hook rolled his eyes, but he said nothing else on the matter. Emma sighed, thinking about what kind of past the two of them shared. In Neverland, Hook was always very vague. He would be quick to tell everyone of Pan's sinister plots, but never about what _he_ had experienced with Peter Pan. She tucked her chin in the palm of her hand, watching as Henry came down the stairs gleefully announcing that Regina was on her way and that she was picking up Snow and Charming.

Emma never thought she'd hear that sentence.

She looked over to Pan. He seemed to be getting along quite well with Henry, despite all that Henry remembered from Neverland. His face lit up when Henry came to sit next to him with a deck of playing cards. Peter was so…eager here. It was almost painful to see. If he did regain his memories… what would she do?

Emma had resigned herself when the trio of men decided to play a game of poker and gamble over Twizzlers and cans of soda. She'd moved away from the couch and to her loft, slipping on a cream sweater that dangled all the way down to her knees. Curious, she looked over the railing at the boys below.

Hook, of course, was winning, Henry seemed to be second, and poor Peter was dead last. Still though, he was smiling. It wasn't cold, or a wolf's smile, it was large, bright and genuine with all his teeth visible and his lips smoothed out like silken velvet. Emma sat on her bed, lowering her head helplessly into her hands as her elbows rested against her knees. What was she thinking? He was…in theory so much older than her, but he was a child… At least, now he was. Peter Pan may have been a wolf in sheep's clothing once, but this Peter- he was certainly a lamb.

"Emma! Aren't you gunna start dinner?" Henry shouted from downstairs.

Smiling softly, Emma jogged down the steps, shaking her head at the boys. "Don't bet your shirt. You'll lose it, kid," Emma said as she ruffled her son's hair.

"Can I help you? I seem to be…"tapped out," Peter said, trying to utilize a word he'd probably just learned. Emma rolled her eyes playfully, waving him over.

"You can make the pasta…that's one of the easy parts in this entirely easy to make meal…"

"Emma's not the greatest cook," Henry said as he took a bite of a Twizzler.

"No candy before dinner! And damn right I'm your average Jane cook! Don't think for a second I'm going to attempt Regina's cooking."

Emma filled one of the pots up about half way for the pasta, turned on the oven to 375 degrees for the garlic bread, and put out a smaller pot for the sauce and finally a pan where she'd cook the meat, opting for a meat sauce spread instead of meat balls. It was easier… After most of her prep work was finished she looked to Peter, who was staring at the water. "What're you doing?"

"I'm cooking?"

Emma laughed. "No, kid. A watched pot never boils."

"I don't want to play cards anymore," Peter whispered.

"Okay… sure. How about we go outside for a bit? Just me and you?" Emma's heart began racing. She wasn't worried about him being his original self, she was worried about his well-being here as a person. Having so many memories lost, and only a few basic memories left not too far off beyond the realm of speech had to be frightening. Emma couldn't even imagine. "Grab your jacket."

They walked outside, though Emma certainly noticed the watchful eye of Hook as the two walked passed him. She couldn't tell if he was staring at her ass, or at Peter...or Peter's ass for that matter. He was wearing Emma's jeans, and they did emphasize how adorable of a butt Peter had...

The crisp air was cool against Emma's face. She inhaled deeply, smelling the cold, crystal scent of the evening air. The wind blew gently enough to tousle her lightly curled hair, but did nothing to completely distract her. She watched Pan as he paced back and forth for a few paces.

"I don't like being lied to."

Emma nodded. "Fair enough. I don't either."

"So then tell me the truth. How bad was I?"

Emma leaned against the building, taking a long inhale and holding the air tightly in her lungs. She breathed out, slouching her shoulders. "Bad. Really bad."

"Tell me." His eyes begged for her to release this dam that obstructed his previous life. It was almost a shame that Emma felt the need to end her evasions.

"Henry. You kidnapped him. You forced him to rip out his own heart for you, deprived me of my family, made me...have extremely awkward encounters with Neal and now Hook… Almost killed my father, almost killed most of everyone actually… "

"The abridged version, yes?" Peter responded.

"I don't want you to know how much of a devil you once were. But…you were an absolute demon and I hated you."

Peter took a step back, placing a small, bitter smile on his lips. "I expected that…"

Emma couldn't hide the misery in her eyes. She reached out, but Peter backed away.

"It's fine, Emma. I'm fine. I wanted to know. I just now don't understand."

Emma raised a single brow.

"How do you go from hating me, to letting me live with you, play poker with your friends and family and eat at your table?"

"Because, Peter, I never hated _you_. I hated Pan. You're not Pan. You're just…Peter." She offered a small smile which thankfully, Peter returned. "And I swear, if you stay out past ten tonight…"

"Don't worry, Hook will have me home safe and sound ten minutes before," Peter said, rolling on his feet.

"What do you hope to gain from him?" Emma asked rubbing her hands together, trying to bring a bit of warmth back into them.

Peter stepped forward, taking her hands into his own. He never appeared to be…but he was taller and longer than her in every way. Her fingers dwarfed his own as he rubbed his hands over hers, gently caressing them with his thumbs. Emma felt her stomach flip. She looked up to see his eyes, carefully hidden away by a soft blanket of eyelashes as he stared down at her fingers. "I want to know what I was to him."

Emma frowned. Before she could say anything further on the subject, she saw Regina's car pull up. Hastily, she dropped her hands to the side, watching as Snow and Charming also got out of the car.

"Food almost ready?" Charming called as he jogged over, kissing Emma on the forehead. It was something he seemed to always enjoy doing, and Emma wasn't going to be the one to break his heart by saying it wasn't necessary; she knew it was necessary to him.

"Why are you two outside? It's freezing!" Snow said as she ran for the door.

"Uh…crap. The pasta!" Emma ran inside, seeing Henry setting the table.

"The pasta is finished," Hook said as he shook out the noodles in a strainer. He wore quite a shit-eating smile, but Emma returned it. Sometimes he really was breathtakingly beautiful, sometimes he was also extremely mature. Hook had an air about him of great confidence but also great sorrow. Sometimes he'd show how good of a man he was under all that eyeliner and leather. It was a shame to Emma that he always tried to keep himself so buried below.

Emma sat down at the table, motioning for Peter to sit next to her. He slid in, a small smirk atop those soft lips. "Ahem, parmesan or none, for the Lady Swan?" Hook asked as he set a plate down in front of her. Emma tore her gaze from Peter's face, feeling her cheeks warm a tad. "I can do it myself."

"You won't ever let a man pamper you, will you?" Hook responded, but nevertheless, he let her shake out her own cheese.

Plates clattered as Henry and Hook went about serving everyone, Hook making terrible innuendos which surprisingly sparked a lot of laughter out of Charming. Emma was glad though. Hook had really impressed Charming in Neverland, whether her father wanted to admit it or not. As everyone sat down to dinner, small talk and routine chatter sprouted across the table. Emma continued to sneak glances at both Hook and Peter.

Just what kind of history did they share that Hook couldn't stop looking at Peter either?

* * *

:)


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry it's been awhile! I had some cosplays to finish before I went to a con a week ago and finally applied to law schools!

Hope this one is liked. Warning: As I stated before, there is slash. This chapter is slash.

* * *

"I mean it, Hook! No later than ten!" Emma shouted as Peter and Hook grabbed their coats and made for the door.

Peter smiled, watching Hook's and Emma's facial expressions. Hook's was smug as he sported a crooked smile. Emma's was stern as she had her brow creased and her lips pressed into a hard line. She was beautiful to Peter. It had been something on his mind for awhile, but one he hadn't wanted to address. Her life was here, and his hadn't been until recently. What if his life came back to him? What would he do? Change? Disappear? Hurt her again?

"Let's go, Peter," Hook said as he held the door open. "Can't waste time with your new mom here nagging to have you home so soon…"

"I don't trust you," Emma said flatly, though there was a twinkle of play in her eyes.

"I'm hurt, Swan." He flashed her a knowing smile, and then the two were off.

The night's sky was a deep blue-black with sparkling stars high above them. Peter could see thick white clouds, though they were more of dark grays and hues of blue in the night sky. They blotted out some of the stars. The moon was high above them, casting silver shadows on the earth's surface.

"I want to show you something," Hook said as he led Peter down the street. "It's at my ship though."

Peter nodded, licking at his lips absentmindedly. He could feel Hook's gaze as the man studied him. Of course it was to be expected. Hook had been rather…nice about Peter's current state. Despite the man saying they had known each other for a long time, there was no frustration or fear in Hook, or at least from what Peter could tell. He had accepted Peter without his memories, and at least seemed as if he wanted to help Peter in this journey.

"I know the answer already, but…" Hook said taking a moment to linger on the last word. "You- truly don't remember anything?"

Peter shook his head. "Nothing. Sometimes I get these small bursts of…emotions? But I don't know why they're there."

"Any happen when you saw me?"

Peter scrunched up his face, shaking his head. "No. Sorry."

Hook nodded, though Peter was sure he could see a bit of hurt in the pirate's features. "What were we? Friends, I presume?"

"Something like that."

Peter furrowed his brow at the answer, but didn't press it further. They walked in silence the rest of the way to the docks, which probably wasn't a very long time, but to Peter it felt like an eternity. He had so many questions to ask Hook, but he was terrified to do so. He could tell the pirate was far off in his own mind most likely mulling about millions of questions for Peter as well.

Hook led Peter down one of the docking bays to a ship that didn't look like any of the others. Instead of metal and reinforced plastics, it was wood. Instead of rudders and engines, it had sails. A black flag with a skull and crossbones swayed lazily in the night sky high above the deck.

"Welcome to the Jolly Roger… again."

Peter winced at the last word, but nevertheless, he hopped onto the ship, feeling it sway very lightly in the water as the waves caressed the sides.

"You weren't fond of the ship. I tried to take you sailing a lot, but you never felt like feeling confined."

"So we were friends?" Peter asked with a light tone, a smile playing at his lips.

Hook looked to him, staring long and hard. "No… We shared a very different kind of relationship."

Peter's heart sank as he watched Hook open a door to the Captain's Cabin and motioned Peter to come inside. The boy felt a faint pull at his heart and a tingle in his toes, like this wasn't where he wanted to be. His body's protests put him on some kind of awkward high alert and thus he hesitated.

"Something wrong?" Hook asked as he still lingered in the doorway.

"N-no…" Peter said as he walked to the cabin. He entered the doorway slowly, his heart racing and his limbs now full aflame with that strange tingling sensation. He heard the door close behind him. He swallowed hard, looking around the dark cabin. Only the light from the moon gave shape to the objects inside.

"Give me a moment," Hook said.

Peter couldn't stop his heart from racing. "So…what kind of relationship did we have then?"

Hook didn't answer.

A sound of cold metal sang into the air, causing Peter to turn quickly and fall over something on the floor. He yelped as his body met the hardwood flooring.

A light erupted into the room, dissipating his fear as Hook was merely hanging a metal lantern above them, giving Peter a rather perplexed look. "You afraid of the dark, mate?"

Peter let out a breath that he didn't even know he had been holding. His heart started to slow its speed as he began to relax, feeling the tingling sensations subside. "I felt…strange…just now."

Hook came to sit in front of Peter on the floor, crossing his legs and leaning forward. "How so?"

"My heart was racing…and it felt like I wanted to run. Kind of like this morning."

Hook laughed softly. "You used to be able to fly. Maybe the ship made your body remember that."

"I could fly?!" Peter's eyes rounded in excitement. To be able to fly… There would be so much freedom! He could go anywhere and do anything! What had it been like? Did clouds have a distinct texture to them? Were they cold? How fast had he been able to go?

"I wanted to show you this. Maybe it'll help you with remembering." Hook pulled out a small treasure box and took off a skeleton key that he had as a necklace around his neck.

"Why do you want me to remember? Emma said I was a demon."

"Yes…and no."

Peter watched as Hook opened the small box, revealing a knife. It was sharp with a few grooves at the base, for assisting with tearing into things that weren't so easy to cut into. The hilt was made from what looked like wood and crocodile skin. Tied around the top of the hit was a brown leather lace with a feather and a small red ruby on it.

Peter took the knife, noticing how it fit perfectly in his hand.

"I made this for you. Long ago."

"Why do you have it then? Wouldn't I have had it?" Peter ran his finger over the blade, feeling how sharp it truly was.

Hook hesitated, running his tongue over the sides of his lips as if trying to search for just the right thing to say. "This isn't easy for me, Peter. It's not even easy calling you that."

"What did you call me?"

"Pan, mostly. I only called you Peter a rare few times."

"Why Pan?"

"Peter suggested that we were informal, close. Intimate."

Peter furrowed his brow. "So we weren't close?"

"I was just about as close to you as one could get, at least for a time. I came to Neverland with my brother in search of an herb that could cure all ailments for our king. What we found was a poison and that poison took my brother's life. You tried to save him, but you said it came with a price. I didn't listen to you and so he died. I came back years later and found you again. At first, I was miserable, drunk, and didn't care. You asked me to do things for you that were…less than honorable, and I did them. I killed people you didn't want around, kidnapped some so you had leverage, and seduced who you wanted destroyed."

"I was horrible…"

"You can't change it, mate. I can't either."

"So you were my hitman?" Peter asked as he twirled the blade around in his fingers.

"For a time, yes. I eventually sobered up and started refusing you. That pissed you off."

"I still can't see how you say I was and wasn't…a demon."

Hook leaned back, supporting his weight with his hands. "You had your reasons for your actions. Most of it was to protect Neverland. I saw nothing wrong in that. Many people came to Neverland wanting to expose it or drain it of its power. You were always there to give someone a chance, see who they were, see if they were necessary or not, or if they were a danger. Most were dangers."

"Then why did I kidnap Henry?"

"To survive."

Peter furrowed his brow in confusion, earning him a small smile from Hook.

"You told me you were dying once. That you needed the Heart of the Truest Believer in order to obtain full immortality."

"So…am I going to die soon?"

"No. You got it. Regina just took it back. But you're alive, so it must have worked."

That was concerning. Peter wasn't too sure how Hook felt so confident about that. What if the metaphorical clock was still ticking down? What if one day he would just fall over dead?

"Tell me about when you stopped being my hitman."

Hook nodded, taking in a deep breath as he looked to be gathering his thoughts. "At first, you were pissed. You killed a few of my crew… So I got even with you. I killed one of your most beloved Lost Boys, Rufio."

"I don't get it!" Peter blurted, not letting Hook finish the story. "Why'd you make me this knife? Why are you being so nice to me now? I used you, I killed people you cared about, I clearly didn't care about you."

Hook smirked. "But you did. It was in your anger that you showed you cared about me. Reacting over the top to my "abandoning" of you, as you called it, only furthered my point. But I've been avoiding one rather large part of this tale… and I don't know if tonight's the best for it to be brought up."

"I don't want anymore lies. I'm tired of lies." Peter's voice was steady, holding a power behind it as he spoke his words. Even Hook seemed to notice the sudden rise in confidence and absolute power of his tone.

"We were lovers…"

Peter cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Lovers?"

"Aye. Not like normal ones though. We didn't exactly kiss each other good night and gush our love for each other."

Peter suddenly felt rather…naked. This man knew him on a level of intimacy that Peter couldn't even fathom. He felt his heart begin racing once more as he fought with his mind to find the right words to say as thoughts erupted like geysers. If they had been lovers… Why was Peter so cruel to him? They had killed each other's friends… How could this man sit before him so calmly knowing everything that encompassed what seemed to be an extremely…different kind of relationship.

"Did we kiss then? Even if it wasn't to say good night?"

Hook laughed, shaking his head in what Peter felt was disbelief. He couldn't help how strange his questions were… He knew _nothing_ anymore. "Yes. We kissed a lot."

"Did I love you?"

Hook's face softened for a moment as he looked to the knife in Peter's hands. "No."

A twinge of guilt shot its way into Peter's heart. He swallowed hard, seeing the way Hook's body language suddenly changed. He was more vulnerable suddenly… more open. "Did… Did you love me?"

Hook pointed to the knife. "I tried. But you didn't want it. I gave you that knife the night I decided to tell you how I truly felt. You never took it."

"That's why I didn't have it…"

Hook nodded in affirmation, his eyes sad and ashamed. Peter felt horrid.

"So… I used you then. Entirely."

"Aye."

"Then why did you bring me here?"

"I don't hate you, Peter. I never have. There are people here who do hate you, even if they don't want to admit it to your face. I know they'll try to hurt you and I can't let that happen. I just wanted you to know… You can trust me. I'm the only one alive who has never hated you."

Peter felt his heart lunch forward in his chest. He suddenly felt breathless. "But you like Emma?"

"What can I say… Pretty things just allure me."

Peter could tell the pirate was trying to build up a wall around him. His body language was closed off now, as he sat up with his arms and legs crossed. His eyes weren't so open anymore as they held a trace of anger in them now. Peter wanted to reach out… He wanted to caress the pirate's face and try to say anything that would stop the pain that Hook was feeling. Instead, he stood up with the knife in his hands, clutching it tightly to his chest. "I think I should go home now…"

"Agreed." Hook said all-too quickly as he stood up and snuffed out the lantern's light.

Peter waited in silence for the door to open, as he was too nervous to trip and break something of Hook's. A the light from the moon drizzled in, Peter exited Hook's cabin and the two made the journey back to Emma's.

"I'm sorry…" Peter said as they were half way back.

Hook stopped walking. "You don't have anything to be sorry for…"

"I do. I hate what I used to be… I'm terrified of being it again and… I'm just so confused here. Everyone still looks at me like they're waiting for me to hurt them. I'm hurting you again…"

"I shouldn't have told you anything…"

"No!" Peter shouted, suddenly feeling a proud determination rising in his stomach. "No more lies. No more hiding. I can handle my past, even if I find Peter Pan to be the most disgusting creature to have ever lived. The only thing I can do is atone for it. I will atone for it. Starting with you and Emma."

"Me _and_ Emma?"

"I stole her family. I broke your heart."

"Let's just keep walking…"

"What did you truly want from me tonight?" Peter said as he stayed firm where he stood.

Hook had his back to him now, but even the pirate paused. His shoulders tensed as the question lingered in the air now. "I wanted you to remember…"

"Why?"

Hook turned around to face him now. Even in the faint, silver light, Peter could see the mild anger and desperation that laced the pirate's eyes. "Because I wanted you back."

"I was cruel to you. I used you."

"It was better than being away from you," Hook countered quickly. "I just needed time to realize that."

Peter felt his heart aching tenfold. He felt the knife in his hands burning, calling out to him to do something… Though what it wanted, Peter was afraid of.

He wanted to bury the knife deep into Hook's skull… To take the mewling creature in front of him and cause him pain… Horrified, Peter dropped his hands to his side, still gripping the knife and began walking briskly away toward Emma's flat. It wasn't too much further now. He didn't know if Hook was following anymore, but he certainly wanted to turn and see. Looking over his shoulder he saw the pirate a few yards away, having not moved an inch. "Hook…" Peter said over his shoulder. He turned around, walking up to the pirate and placing the knife in the man's hands. "I can't be this again. I can't be Pan… I want… I want to be Peter… just Peter." He closed the pirate's fingers softly over the hilt, allowing his fingers to dwell atop them, rubbing his pinky finger gently over the man's thumb. "I need time. And I also need you to accept that it'll be different this time."

Hook smiled softly as he pulled away from Peter's hands. He tucked the knife into his boot. "Shall we then?"

They walked the rest of the way in a comfortable, understanding silence. Peter had a lot to think about… Hook loved him once, and most likely still did as tonight would dictate. Despite all the horrors Peter had inflicted upon him, the pirate still wanted him again. And Emma though… Peter may have no memories anymore, but he knew when someone was staring just a little too long… Even he had made his first, small move on her this evening. It was complicated… and Peter knew that now wasn't the time to decide anything about anyone.

The apartment building was just ahead of them now as Hook turned to Peter. "I'm sorry if I've caused you any turmoil tonight."

"No. I needed to hear it. All of it." Peter stood on his toes to reach Hook's lips where he placed a fast kiss. Those lips were rough as his stubble rubbed at Peter's face, but it wasn't unpleasant. "Good night, Hook."

"It's Killian. You always called me by my real name."

"Yet I never let you call me by mine?"

"You always tried to get me to call you Peter. It was my choice to call you Pan."

"Good night then, Killian. I'll see you?"

"Tomorrow, perhaps."

Peter nodded as he turned to go inside. Oddly enough, the anger he felt toward Hook had completely dissipated and was replaced with a warm, longing sensation. He got to the door and turned to watch the pirate walk away in the night, almost blending into the darkness entirely. Peter sighed. It was hard knowing you had a life once, and that life knew you… but you knew nothing of it anymore. Was this the right thing then? Pursuing the old life, or trying to start anew?

Brushing it aside, Peter walked into the apartment, startled when he saw Emma sitting on the couch with a single light on and a book in her lap. She looked up at him with a single raised brow. "Good night?"

"Yes?" Why did that come out as such a question? Peter suddenly felt ashamed. He hadn't even questioned if a relationship between two men was okay. Did she know suddenly? Was it not okay? Was she angry?

Emma smiled. "Did you learn anything?" Her smile had been warm, but Peter felt there was suspicion in those eyes.

"If I had?"

Emma cocked her head slightly to the side. "Do I need to be worried?"

"Are we never going to get past this?" Peter answered with another question.

Emma blinked, surprise evident in her rosy cheeks. "I'm sorry… This is just…hard."

"If I make you uncomfortable, I can leave… I'll stay with Hook, if he wants me."

"It's not that I'm uncomfortable. You can't blame me for being a bit…suspicious. Every time I look at you I get scared it'll be the last time I see such kindness in your eyes." She smiled warmly at him, seemingly trying to ease his worry.

"I'm sorry, Emma… I know this is hard for everyone and I feel…so ashamed."

"Look kid…" Emma closed her book. "We've all made mistakes. Some worse than others. I've made mistakes. Some pretty big ones…actually." She paused, nodding silently to herself. "I can't say everything will be perfect or turn out okay. I can't say you won't ever remember. We just have to…adjust to this."

Peter nodded, feeling his eyes grow tired. "I just want to stop feeling like everyone is waiting for me to change back. Even Hook tonight…" He stopped dead in his tracks, his gaze snapping to Emma's perplexed face.

"Okay…" Emma stood up, going over to the window. "I can't pretend I wasn't stalking the window from time to time tonight. Part of me…really wants you in our family, but the other part is so afraid that you'll wake up as Pan again and kill us all in our sleep. I saw you with Hook out there and I thought…that it was all over."

"You…saw?"

"I assumed from your…behavior- that he'd somehow gotten you to change, and that him helping me get Henry was some elaborate scheme that the two of you had devised."

"You don't trust him either, do you?" Peter asked, feeling his heart begin to pump faster.

"I have a hard time trusting anyone, kid. It's not just him."

"So you saw us…" Peter's face grew hot. "You saw me kiss him…"

"Yes. I thought that since you did that… You had to remember, otherwise why would you?" Her expression was guarded, but Peter could see the faintest of hurt in her eyes…

Peter felt furious. How could he go backwards to rekindle old memories with new when all it did was present new challenges? Everyone would feel he had some kind of hidden agenda. Even Emma…

"He told me about our past together. Said we were lovers."

Emma sat back on the couch, but it was more of a collapse. "That escalated quickly…"

"Is it wrong?"

"With him?" Emma questioned.

"I don't know. Anything. Emma I don't… I'm confused." He stared at his feet, wanting the earth to open up and just swallow him. Why was this so complicated? Why did it _have_ to be so complicated?

"It's not…wrong," Emma said delicately. "If you love someone then you love someone."

"But I don't love him. I don't know him."

Emma crossed her arms over her chest. "Then why did you kiss him?"

"Because… I felt I had to." Peter admitted the pirate was an attractive man. There was also a sense of comfort in such familiarity with someone who had known him before, and accepted him. "I have a new life with new feelings and new concerns. I don't know if going backwards is a good idea or not."

"You don't have to rush into anything. You can take time."

"I feel I've hurt you somehow. Did you care for him? Even a little bit?"

Emma paused, curling her toes into the rug underneath her feet. "It's…complicated. I've got a lot of complicated in my life. Him…Neal… You."

"I'm sorry…"

"Let's just…go to bed okay? We can talk about this more tomorrow." Emma pulled out the blankets for Peter and laid them out on the couch. She gave him an awkward smile and jogged lightly up the steps to her loft.

Peter collapsed into the couch, feeling like he'd just stabbed Emma in the back. She had risked a lot to keep him here, and each day she was risking it all over again. Sighing, he closed his eyes, forcing himself to go to sleep. Perhaps tomorrow it wouldn't feel like he was still holding that knife and digging it into her chest…

* * *

I was nodding off a bit while writing this one, so I feel Emma is kind of out of character, blah.

Hope you liked it at least? :)


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